Why do some people give up on their dreams, and others keep going?

Big Vision Baby Steps Dreams Visions

I’m reading a great book at the moment called: ‘Grit, The Power of Passion and Perseverance’ – by Angela Duckworth. I’ve always been fascinated by perseverance.. how some people keep going and how others give up. It’s not easy to keep going sometimes, whatever it is we’re doing or working towards, very often the ONLY difference between those that succeed and those that don’t, is just keeping going.

So what’s the secret of keeping going, what separates the doers from the dreamers? Let’s explore…

One of the biggest traits I admire in people is persistence – the tenacity and focus to keep going even when things get difficult. Working with business people and just observation of people in general, I notice that a great source of frustration is their own disappointment in themselves when they give up on their dreams and goals.

You know that point where you find it difficult to keep going? the stretch in the middle where movement towards your goals seems painfully slow, or even non-existent. You get lost in the doubt that it will ever happen, lose your way and ultimately give up. Maybe you start a new project, or maybe you just give up altogether and let things wash over you, preferring to avoid the pain of failure to living with the frustration of chasing the dream.

There’s one key thing that might be missing from your Big Vision plan…

‘Your vision or goal is not aligned closely enough to something you truly care about, something you care about so much that you’re willing to stay loyal to it

When you have a vision or goal that is built upon a ‘ single passion of supreme importance’ even when things get boring, painful or frustrating – your passion is enduring and your direction is clear.

How can we support ourselves to ’stay loyal to our dreams?’

1. Craft your vision, seek your passion and follow what you care about.
Learn how to develop that ‘high level’ goal that is built upon a single passion – something you care about so much that you’re willing to stay loyal to it. Start to follow your interests – your passions lie in your interests. It’s OK to enjoy what you do and it’s permissible to build your business around your passions.

2. Commit and re-commit
Accept that having the vision is a great step forward, but then there real work begins. Develop a simple system that gets you back on track – every day! not just now and again…

3.’Be satisfied – being unsatisfied’
If you can become content ‘being in the zone of frustration’ and you can learn to sit with the feeling of wanting more and seeking answers, then you’re more likely to not give up. If you’re satisfied being unsatisfied, you’re going to be more likely to enjoy the moment, rather than waiting for things to be just right before you start to reward yourself and enjoy where you’re at. I’m not talking about giving up and allowing life to wash over you… It’s that point where ‘the chase becomes as enjoyable as the capture’ Where you’d do what you do anyway, because you enjoy it and have an ongoing interest in seeing it work.

4. Being happy failing often
The thing about life is the 9 times out of 10, things don’t work out first time, or even second time… but if you keep at them for long enough, you learn and through trial and error, you start to see results. So if you accept that failing is just part of the journey, life for a ‘vision chaser’ becomes a whole lot easier and happier.

5. Cultivate quiet and go your own way
If you can sit with yourself and listen to your own voice, you’ll build a kind of ‘quiet determination’ that will enable you to stick to a course once decided upon. Learning to be content to go your own way, means you won’t be constantly seeking others approval, you’ll have an inner knowing that you’re on the right path and be less likely to switch directions when things get shaky. Listening to others give theirpearls of wisdom might be just enough to shake you off course completely.

6. Develop your hierarchy of goals. (new blog)
Your vision should be your ‘Top level Goal’. This is your big why, the main aim of the game. Anything else you do to get your there become your second level goals and they are driven by your bigger why. The good thing about this is you’re less attached to them, so when one doesn’t work, others take their place. It doesn’t become such a big failure, just a small trial towards a bigger result. The choice of giving up becomes less likely because you’re just adjusting a smaller level goal, which is all directed at a much larger, value driven outcome.

Get started now… If you’re seeking to pinpoint your passion, start with these simple ideas

  • Begin with awareness…
    Allow yourself time to follow your interests and see where they take you.
  • Ask yourself what you really care about?
  • What would you do with your time if ‘no-one else cared?’
  • Spend a few moments every day to tune in with your choices for your day,
    where are they taking you? Are they driving you towards a clearly defined outcome?

Older Post Newer Post